Family might not always be blood.
Fabulous Friendsgiving

We all groan about it each year— the holidays encroach upon us earlier and earlier.

Halloween candy is set out near the start of school, and Christmas music blares in department stores at the beginning of November.

And who even cares about Thanksgiving anymore?

It’s almost comical to observe the progression of the stores’ opening hours over the past decade— the entire premise of Black Friday is comical, given its proximity to a supposedly gracious holiday. We laughed when stores opened at 6 a.m. and then 5 a.m. We raised our eyebrows when stories arose of people being trampled to death when the doors finally opened. And we sighed when the stores started opening at midnight.

But I am outraged at stores that open at 8 p.m. on Thanksgiving day, touting their Black Friday deals. Hold the phone— did I miss something? 8 p.m. on a Thursday is not Friday. And, historically and theoretically, Thanksgiving is a patriotic holiday that honors gratitude for the love we have among our family and friends.

We then take a giant dump on that sentiment and flaunt our materialistic desires in the form of of 32″ HD televisions for $4.00 at Walmart.

Fine. I get it. Capitalism is at work, and it seems to be the best fitting system for our country.

But for those who advocate for TRADITIONAL FAMILY VALUES, I sincerely wish that you are not braving the cold tonight, awaiting whatever gaming console that you scoped out in the ads. Shame on you, if you are, for you are not practicing what you preach.

I would rather the employees have at least one day off to spend time with their families, instead of having to work on a “holiday.” What makes this even more upsetting is that Thanksgiving is a secular holiday. It knows no religious affiliation and is a day, much like the 4th of July, that all Americans can celebrate regardless of creed. And what other All-American holiday can one devour massive amounts of food— oh, maybe any other day.

My point is this: get your good deal, but only after having a blissful, heartwarming holiday with those whom you love. And that better be at the ass crack of dawn on Friday.